Aside

Love allows understanding to dawn, and understanding is precious. Where you are understood, you are at home. Understanding nourishes belonging. When you really feel understood, you feel free to release yourself into the trust and shelter of the other person’s soul.― John O’Tommy Donohue

This really struck me this morning. These are the friendships I find most fulfilling that I desire deeply. I think that’s why I am so very dialectic. I have this deep desire to understand others I care about and feel understood by them.

This equates to loving and being loved deeply, authentically.

Although I realize this can be considered un-realistic at times it is still deeply ingrained in me. To feel understood, to understand, to connect. I have a very difficult time with open-endedness, log periods of silence or lack of closure.

But maybe it’s about learning to understand myself on a deeper level and trusting that process. Trusting the silence and learning to hear through it in a deeper way. The ability to truly listen to Gods voice.

But still anything less then this mutual understanding feels shallow and superficial to me.

And even through questioning, through my messy spaces I share openly with others in the hope that there is something redemptive in this ugly process, that one person may be touched through my birth pains and experience some level of freedom.

Or maybe it’s the connection that brings comfort, or both.

Fill your paper (computer screen) with the breathings of your heart.

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